When weve been dumped in a relationship we often do many things to try to get our ex back. Some of them can be helpful, but many of the things we do can hurt or completely ruin our chances of getting our ex back.
First, we may try to apologize til were blue in the face. Saying Im sorry ten times or a hundred times doesn't work. If an apology was going to work, one or two would do it. Repeated, earnest, endless apologies don't work in most cases because there are some things you must do first before you apologize.
If you have apologized and it hasn't gotten your ex to take you back, then you need to learn some basic emotional intelligence before you try apologizing again. Two steps you can take BEFORE you apologize are to own up to what you did wrong and then to let your ex vent in a particular way about how they feel about what you did wrong.
If your ex dumped you, their heart is now filled with negative, unpleasant feelings about you. Learning how to help them to vent and release these negative feelings is a key to getting them back. Apologizing on top of their hurt or angry feelings doesn't make any difference. That's why learning the simple steps to support your ex in venting and releasing their bad feelings can make all the difference.
A second big mistake we make is to come across as too desperate, needy and hopeless. Leaving them 20 text messages or voice mails a day is way too weak. Telling them they've gotta give you another chance is disrespectful of their feelings. Your ex won't want to take back an emotional wreck.
Yes, your heart is hurting. Yes, you feel desperate and needy. There is this large hole in your life that you want to fill with your ex. That's very understandable. However, you dont want to come across as needy. Keep your neediness to yourself as much as possible!
If your ex gets the desperate/needy vibe, it can generate pity for you. But pity won't get them to want to take you back. Instead, share with them, if appropriate, how much you've learned from losing them.
But avoid coming across as weak and needy. Avoid apologizing ten thousand times. By not doing those two things you will improve your chances of getting them back dramatically. - 16035
First, we may try to apologize til were blue in the face. Saying Im sorry ten times or a hundred times doesn't work. If an apology was going to work, one or two would do it. Repeated, earnest, endless apologies don't work in most cases because there are some things you must do first before you apologize.
If you have apologized and it hasn't gotten your ex to take you back, then you need to learn some basic emotional intelligence before you try apologizing again. Two steps you can take BEFORE you apologize are to own up to what you did wrong and then to let your ex vent in a particular way about how they feel about what you did wrong.
If your ex dumped you, their heart is now filled with negative, unpleasant feelings about you. Learning how to help them to vent and release these negative feelings is a key to getting them back. Apologizing on top of their hurt or angry feelings doesn't make any difference. That's why learning the simple steps to support your ex in venting and releasing their bad feelings can make all the difference.
A second big mistake we make is to come across as too desperate, needy and hopeless. Leaving them 20 text messages or voice mails a day is way too weak. Telling them they've gotta give you another chance is disrespectful of their feelings. Your ex won't want to take back an emotional wreck.
Yes, your heart is hurting. Yes, you feel desperate and needy. There is this large hole in your life that you want to fill with your ex. That's very understandable. However, you dont want to come across as needy. Keep your neediness to yourself as much as possible!
If your ex gets the desperate/needy vibe, it can generate pity for you. But pity won't get them to want to take you back. Instead, share with them, if appropriate, how much you've learned from losing them.
But avoid coming across as weak and needy. Avoid apologizing ten thousand times. By not doing those two things you will improve your chances of getting them back dramatically. - 16035
About the Author:
You can discover Proven Reconnect Methods to get your ex back in a book about Get Your Ex Back In One Day. Johnnie S Laney teaches relationship and emotional intelligence courses and you can get the free course 7 Vital Relationship Insights You Never discovered In School here at Love Intimacy And Marriage Advice.
